23 Mar 2015

Air Jordan CDP and not the first half of Full Metal Jacket

Blondie was originally the strip’s focal point, they just never bothered to change the title. She wasn’t married to Dagwood at all; it was just a strip about a single girl living it up in the city. The series began in the early 30s, and Blondie was a “flapper chick” with the dignified last name of Boopadoop.

She was always better than Dagwood deserved.

Newspaper readers weren’t exactly interested in the misadventures of a fun loving single girl in the glitzy city, who liked having rich gentlemen callers. They bought the paper to read the news, look for jobs and maybe boil it later to add much needed texture to their shoe leather burritos. So the series was reformatted, and Blondie’s beau at the time of the change, Dagwood Bumstead, asked her to marry him so they could settle down. But there was a problem: Even Dagwood was originally a wealthy socialite and they first had to bankrupt the pair. The ensuing storyline had Dagwood’s parents disowning the couple because they considered Blondie a skank, well below their social standing.

Now that Dagwood was on his own financially, he got a mid level job working for Mr. Dithers, he and Blondie got hitched, and his wacky, eating disorder hijinks became the series’ main focus. It says a lot about the priorities of the time: People were so despondent that, even in fantasy, they couldn’t set their sights higher than a steady, crappy job, a comfortable couch and a giant sandwich.

Wow! That’s a story I can relate to! Tell us about the bread again, mister .

2. Popeye Was a Minor Side Character to Olive Oyl

Popeye is the ultimate underdog and the champion of everyone’s least favorite canned vegetable. We all know the basic premise of a Popeye the Sailor Man short: Popeye tries to woo the rail thin Olive Oyl, Bluto (professional bully at large) beats Popeye up and kidnaps Olive Oyl, Popeye eats some spinach and beats Bluto nearly to death.

Remember kids, hurting people will make women love you.

The comic strip that originated Popeye actually had nothing to do with him. The strip in question was called Thimble Theater and didn’t feature the titular sailor at all. It did, however, feature Olive Oyl, her brother Castor and her boyfriend Harold Hamgravy (later shortened to just Ham Gravy). Seriously, this is just getting sad people were really hungry back then.

Even the villains just wanted a modest meal.

Ten years into Thimble Theater’s Air Jordan CDP run, Ham and Castor set out on a trip to an island casino. They needed a boat that needed a sailor, and that’s where they first encountered Popeye. But reader reaction to the burly curmudgeon was so positive that he was brought back and given an expanded role. Thimble Theater’s popularity sky rocketed, Castor was given the axe, Olive was relegated to the background and Ham Gravy changed his name and went on to become President of these United States.

1. Beetle Bailey Wasn’t in the Army

Beetle Bailey is a sad sack of Air Jordan 5s a soldier who is perpetually stuck in basic training, and often physically abused by Drill Sergeant Snorkel. Somehow that’s supposed to be funny, and not the first half of Full Metal Jacket.

It had nothing to do with the Army. Though Bailey was always the title character, his original moniker was “Spider,” and the strip was about the wacky shenanigans of a kid going to college.

The standards for “wacky shenanigans” were a lot lower back then.

So what happened? Well, early on in the Nike LeBron 11 series, Beetle “accidentally” joined the Army. This was meant to be a one off storyline poking fun at military life. But with America just entering into the Korean War at the time, Beetle’s military antics proved especially popular so it was decided he would not return to school after all. He was stuck in the Army, against his will.

With a depressing use of reverse psychology

Since enduring the horrors of war isn’t exactly “wacky,” Beetle is Air Jordan Fusion 4 a member of the only infantry unit to never leave basic training. It’s not exactly exploring new ground by trying to find humor amidst violence and tragedy it’s just a constant rehashing of old gags with Army life as little more than a novel backdrop. Though credit should be given: Beetle Bailey is, to this day, the only comic strip based on the complete and permanent destruction of a child’s dreams for a better life.

Aside from Family Circus, of course. You can find him at his blog, There’s No Success Like Failure. Brian Daniel does a webcomic Air Jordan 17s called Shifter.

And pick up our book because it’ll show you how to reinvent yourself as a smart person.

For more insane origin stories, check out 5 Classic Board Games With Disturbing Origin Stories and 7 Shockingly Dark Origins of Lovable Children’s Characters.

And stop by Linkstorm to see what Swaim looked like before he was repackaged as a hip funny man.

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